Tag: sickness

  • Sonnets from the Portuguese – 36 to 40

    Elizabeth Barrett Browning

    XXXVI

    When we met first and loved, I did not build
    Upon the event with marble. Could it mean
    To last, a love set pendulous between
    Sorrow and sorrow? Nay, I rather thrilled,
    Distrusting every light that seemed to gild
    The onward path, and feared to overlean
    A finger even. And, though I have grown serene
    And strong since then, I think that God has willed
    A still renewable fear . . . O love, O troth . . .
    Lest these enclasped hands should never hold,
    This mutual kiss drop down between us both
    As an unowned thing, once the lips being cold.
    And Love, be false! if he, to keep one oath,
    Must lose one joy, by his life’s star foretold.

     XXXVII

    Pardon, oh, pardon, that my soul should make,
    Of all that strong divineness which I know
    For thine and thee, an image only so
    Formed of the sand, and fit to shift and break.
    It is that distant years which did not take
    Thy sovranty, recoiling with a blow,
    Have forced my swimming brain to undergo
    Their doubt and dread, and blindly to forsake
    Thy purity of likeness and distort
    Thy worthiest love to a worthless counterfeit:
    As if a shipwrecked Pagan, safe in port,
    His guardian sea-god to commemorate,
    Should set a sculptured porpoise, gills a-snort
    And vibrant tail, within the temple-gate.

    XXXVIII

    First time he kissed me, he but only kissed
    The fingers of this hand wherewith I write;
    And ever since, it grew more clean and white,
    Slow to world-greetings, quick with its “Oh, list,”
    When the angels speak. A ring of amethyst
    I could not wear here, plainer to my sight,
    Than that first kiss. The second passed in height
    The first, and sought the forehead, and half missed,
    Half falling on the hair. O beyond meed!
    That was the chrism of love, which love’s own crown,
    With sanctifying sweetness, did precede.
    The third upon my lips was folded down
    In perfect, purple state; since when, indeed,
    I have been proud and said, “My love, my own.”

    XXXIX

    Because thou hast the power and own’st the grace
    To look through and behind this mask of me
    (Against which years have beat thus blanchingly
    With their rains), and behold my soul’s true face,
    The dim and weary witness of life’s race,–
    Because thou hast the faith and love to see,
    Through that same soul’s distracting lethargy,
    The patient angel waiting for a place
    In the new Heavens,–because nor sin nor woe,
    Nor God’s infliction, nor death’s neighborhood,
    Nor all which others viewing, turn to go,
    Nor all which makes me tired of all, self-viewed,–
    Nothing repels thee, . . . Dearest, teach me so
    To pour out gratitude, as thou dost, good!

     XL

    Oh, yes! they love through all this world of ours!
    I will not gainsay love, called love forsooth.
    I have heard love talked in my early youth,
    And since, not so long back but that the flowers
    Then gathered, smell still. Mussulmans and Giaours
    Throw kerchiefs at a smile, and have no ruth
    For any weeping. Polypheme’s white tooth
    Slips on the nut if, after frequent showers,
    The shell is over-smooth,–and not so much
    Will turn the thing called love, aside to hate
    Or else to oblivion. But thou art not such
    A lover, my Beloved! thou canst wait
    Through sorrow and sickness, to bring souls to touch,
    And think it soon when others cry “Too late.”